Toxic

"It's getting late, to give you up. I took a sip from my devil's cup. Slowly, it's taking over me." - Britney Spears

Yes, I did just quote Britney. Sue me. But in my defense, Toxic is the only song I own of hers. Though, when one of her tunes comes on GenX, I can't help but to sing and dance along. But I'm talking about the older stuff, not this new crap that Ke$ha helps write - yuck!

Anyways......

This week's Bible study might've been my favorite so far, despite the excruciating headache I had. There was a lot of laughter and a lot of good verses and discussion and all that jazz.

One of the discussions was over the things that we need to eliminate in our lives. Not just to better serve and follow our Lord, but to be better friends, to have healthier relationships, and just be there more for those we love. Getting rid of certain things would honestly make us more mentally, physically, and emotionally healthy....which in turn would make us happier and better to be around. So of course, we were asked what things we need to cut out.

There were a lot of answers that ranged from eating unhealthy things (don't know if I could EVER go there.....), deleting apps on phones, canceling Netflix/cable, working less, spending less time with friends and more with family. All very good answers and I'm sure most people could relate to at least one if not all.

My answer? Toxic people.

I'll preface this by saying that I am a very loyal person....a VERY LOYAL person. I mean, I've never cheated on a boyfriend (and for those of you who know my dating history - as far as I'm concerned, if I never called him my boyfriend and we never had a conversation about what we were, the fact that I dated someone else at the same time is not cheating....if I liked him enough, I didn't date anyone else, just fyi). I'm loyal to the point that I get ran over if I'm not careful. I get my feelings hurt, but forgive because I care about the person that hurt me. I'm the type of person that wants to believe that those who claim to love me and care about me would never screw me over. But as a beloved country song once said "as much as you burn me baby, I should be ashes by now." Still, I'm too loyal for my own good. Always have been. Probably always will be.

What is a toxic person? There are so many different kinds.

There are the negative people - a category that I know I've been guilty of falling in, but have been making an effort to change that. You know - the people that just can't find good in anything....always complaining, always finding something wrong. Always bitter. And for the record, when I'm in "bitter mode," I at least make it comical.

Another kind are the people who just wanna have fun. The party people. Yes, go ahead and say it.....I know what you are thinking already..... "umm, Cheyenne, don't you fall into this category too?" At one time, yes, I did. I had my "wild times," if you will. I drank more than I should have. Cussed more than I should have. I was going out 3-4 times per week. I didn't care about, well, anything really. It went on for a good 9 months probably before I realized how ridiculous it was. Don't get me wrong, the people in this category are not "bad people" (okay, some are, but not all). They are just living life and having a good time. And there is nothing wrong with that, to an extent. But as someone who is trying to serve God, it's not the ideal environment to be in. There's nothing wrong with going out occasionally......having a drink or two with some friends, laughing and dancing and having fun with friends. I still do every once in a while. But when it consumes your life, it might be time to reevaluate priorities.

There are the attention whores. The kind with the sexy/slutty/kissy/duck faced pics that are CONSTANTLY being posted. The ones who post something every hour (now, I'm guilty of this during award shows - sorry, but I gotta share my opinions!). Those who just start ridiculous stupid drama...those who thrive off of it!!! The annoying and excessively tacky/inappropriate ones. Those who want the world to know every detail of their problems. Ugh!!! Fix yourself or shut up! I have no respect for someone who is capable of helping themselves and making their life better but refuse to do so.

Lastly, there are the hurtful ones. The ones who might've been good to you at some point which is why they are in your life in the first place, but ultimately........they just hurt you. Maybe it's a deep wound or maybe it's just hateful words that they say and then say "just kidding" - but you can only kid so much. The selfish people who don't care about your feelings, just their own. That keep apologizing over and over for the same thing, but keep doing that thing.

I know people in all categories. And slowly, they are going bye-bye. I may be close to some, and not so close to some. But either way, I don't want them around anymore.

So I'm deleting them out of my life. Off my "friends" list - I know, it's childish to delete people - but sometimes you just don't want to be reminded.....plus, it makes it too tempting to fall back into that toxic-ness again. Numbers are being deleted out of the phone, so that I'm not tempted to call or text just to see how they are - again, too tempting.

So if you take one thing away from this, I hope it's a lesson on how not to be a toxic person - haha!

What is something you need to eliminate from your life?

And just for your entertainment: